The title could also be “Unreasonable Members (a.k.a the majority of liberals)”, because one does not step into the cesspool of liberalism without embracing a certain level of lunacy. I originally intended to write this post as a short follow-up to The Modern Liberal Part I – Reasonable Members, but I quickly realized that I wasn’t entirely sure how to approach unreasonable liberals.
The more I thought about the issue, the more I questioned even the existence of “reasonable” liberals. Perhaps they’re out there, just hiding in their homes to avoid the negative stereotypes associated with their crazy ilk. If so, I’ve never really met any. In my experience, any liberals who appeared rational on the surface eventually revealed a crazy side once you dug deep enough or hit a particularly sensitive topic.
Lately, I’ve been doing my best to completely avoid liberals because I can no longer tolerate the hypocrisy and outright idiocy they propagate in the name of “tolerance” and “fairness” and “equality”. However, I’ve managed to find myself in the middle of three “discussions” (if you can call it that) with their ilk in just the past few months. Reminded me a little bit of my time in college, only this time it wasn’t state-sanctioned bias or supported by a college professor.
These interactions reminded me just how insatiable the liberal bloodthirst for inequality and social destruction truly is. While I walked away from each interaction with my head held high, it’s difficult to say that I “won” because no minds were changed and I doubt the lunacy of each leftoid was even dented by a collision of reality.
But it got me thinking about tactics to deal with these people. Unfortunately, I learned most of these tactics after college, but they still come in handy when interacting with friends and family who are entrenched in the leftoid plague.
1. Aim for the audience
Make no mistake, every political “discussion” with a liberal is NOT a discussion. It is a trial. You are being put on trial for your views no matter how calmly and rationally you express them, no matter how much evidence you provide on your behalf. The liberal is not attempting to change your mind or the minds of those who are witnessing the trial; he is a prosecutor in the court of social justice, and all your friends are witnesses on behalf of your guilt.
Instead of attacking with facts and figures, appeal to the emotion of the crowd. As the wise (albeit fictional) Proximo stated in Gladiator: “Win the crowd, and you’ll win your freedom.” The mob is always out for blood, eagerly awaiting the next thrust and parry of verbal barbs. They aren’t worried about facts or figures; only the outcome of the blood match. Give them what they want and utterly destroy your opponent with unreasonable debating tactics and you’ll be basking in the dishonorable glory that is the appeasement of the crowd in no time.
2. Agree and Amplify
Most of the time, arguing solves nothing, and attempting to “discuss” rationally leads to your demise. No liberal plays fair, and no liberal is out to learn from your experiences or your wisdom. So give them what they want and agree with them — but take their ridiculous notions to their logical conclusion. For example:
Leftoid: “We really should have schools set aside for Mexican immigrants who can only speak Spanish.”
Beacon of Rationality: “I absolutely agree, because then you and I will be absolutely certain which schools are failures and can send our children to the GOOD schools.”
Leftoid: “We need to close the gender wage gap.”
Leftoid Lambaster: “Absolutely. Let’s start with secretaries and CEOs.”
(Or perhaps: “Agreed. I’d like to make as much money as Hilary Clinton.”)
Once they’ve awakened to the horrific realization that they agree with a non-lefty (le gasp!) and that their suggestions have unintended consequences and they’ll stumble over themselves like a 15 year old boy asking Megan Fox to prom. They’ve already made a statement that promotes social “justice”, so to backtrack on that — in their minds (and the crowd, don’t forget the crowd) — would be akin to admitting they’re inherently racist.
3. Fear not their anger
For most liberals, it’s not just your opinions they despise — it’s you. Most are incapable of separating the person from the opinions (just look at how many people wanted to boycott Ender’s Game because Orson Scott Card doesn’t embrace the radical notion that the promotion of homosexuality doesn’t further dissolve the family unit). No matter what you say, do, think, or feel once you’ve been outed as a non-lefty, the leftoid will despise you with all its heart and will set its targeting lasers to kill until you either shy away in fear or commit suicide. Either is acceptable to them.
In short, it is impossible to appease somebody who is offended by your very existence. They will rally their anger and attack you regardless of your attempts to “find common ground”. This leads us into Rule #4:
4. Never apologize; there is no common ground
As stated in Rule #3, leftoids are offended by your very existence. There is no “common ground” with leftoids, feminists, and other irrational parasites, because they will not stop until you are utterly destroyed. When faced with tribal masses set on cultural genocide, one does not wave a white flag of truce as they’re barreling down on your home; you stand up on the roof with a .50 caliber machine gun and mow them down before they have the opportunity to cross your lawn.
Apologizing may be a reasonable tactic when interacting with reasonable people, but never NEVER NEVER apologize to a leftoid. Their psychotic mentality will immediately latch onto it as a victory and an invitation to continue the assault against your character. Consider the unfolding fiasco surrounding Donald Sterling — the Oprahs and Obamas of the world will never forgive him, never like him, and never allow him to own another basketball team again regardless of his behavior going forward. Why attempt to appease the chronically offended and the insatiably bloodthirsty masses? Let them bare their fangs and gnash their teeth as you unflinchingly stand by your statements, knowing full well that you remain a bastion of rationality in a sea of mental disorders.
5. Avoid facts
Facts are a quagmire that will sink you to the vacuous halls of defeat quicker than any other tactic. We are interested in facts and figures to back up our views, but the modern leftoid is not. They are interested in using whatever tools necessary to destroy you. Adding facts to your “discussion” with a leftoid is like adding hurdles to your sprint and expecting them to do the same. Leftoids are dishonorable and unconcerned with logic or facts interfering with their opinions. The moment you appeal to their logic rather than their emotion is the moment they can jump on the offensive and systematically dismantle you with non sequitur ideals, sound bites, and other assorted propaganda.
Just watch any Democratic-sponsored TV ad. None are based on facts, and if they are, the facts are rounded up by incredibly biased sources like the CBO.
6. Remain on the offensive
As a corollary to Rule #4 (never apologize), never go on the defensive. Never explain your position. Do you see leftoids attempting to explain their position? Absolutely not. In their eyes, they are gods of virtue and paragons of justice. Such divinity is never subject to scrutiny.
Adopt the same strategy. Never defend your position. Attack the opponent’s position and, more importantly, his character. Once he loses the crowd, you can remain on the offensive permanently and watch as his superego devolves into a puddle of loosely joined strands of non-sensible sound bites.
It may be difficult for you to adopt these tactics at first because it’s so contrary to our nature. Logic dictates the universe, why should it not dictate politics? But the inimitable ability of leftoids to bend space and time to match their delusional worldview is unmatched. Never underestimate the power of the dark side, and never make concessions to it. If you find these tactics difficult to use, fake it until you make it. Watch and learn how liberals “debate”, and use their strategies against them.
When enough of us adopt these tactics in the aim of destroying the disease that is liberalism, then we can go back to a political structure based on the foundations of logic and reason.
Got any more tactics in defeating the loony leftoid masses? Leave a comment below and I’ll pick a few favorites to share.